Ditch vanilla! 8 more masturbation positions to give you the best orgasm ever

Fickle is fun, especially in the bedroom. From condoms to sex positions, while plain vanilla is good at times, it’s time to explore something more daring. So, why just masturbate the same old way? Unlike men, women do have the option of touching themselves in various ways, each more exciting than the other. So here’s a non-exhaustive list of masturbation positions to give yourself the best hand-job ever.

Undress, maybe not
Well, remember those hot and steamy quickie sessions when you really didn’t have time to get those straps off? Well, nothing’s hotter than that, really. So why not try some solo action that way. Just make sure that the fabric is soft enough to not hurt your Ms Vee-Vee.

Man up!
Not literally. To switch from the usual circular or frantic gestures on your clitoris, you can try handling it like a penis. Hold the lips from the roots and go back and forth to give it a hand job. However, this may not work for you.

Tap tap tap you go
Well, whether the panties are on or not, you can try tapping lightly on different areas of your honeypot. The clitoris is more or less sensitive. One side can do more than another, and that’s why you should not hesitate to try. You have nothing to lose anyway.

A shiver down your…
Did you know that sensations of hot and cold too can have unexpectedly sensuous effects? Use an ice cube and rub it on the sensitive genitals, or at the entrance of the vagina. The extreme cold confronted with the warmth of your stimulated sexual organs can give you sensations that will rock your world, literally.

Slick and Slippery
Some lubricants have the special feature of alternating between hot and cold, like the Durex Play O Gel. Lubricants are a good idea anyway. A vagina too dry will not be very pleasant to touch. Saliva can help, but for a short time, while the gel will hold you throughout the experience. So explore and find a new lubricant to add novelty to your rendezvous with self.

Not so handsy
Well, who said you can only use your hands or tools to get off the high horse of horniness? Remember Natalie Portman in Black Swan? You too can help yourself with a duvet or a pillow on which you straddle. The rubbing of the bump on your clitoris, along with the stimulation of the vulva will undoubtedly give you the orgasm of a lifetime. You can even get your imagination running wild here, it will escalate the process. *winks*

Mirror, mirror on the wall
Ditch that girl-next-door look and dress up in the sexiest lingerie. It is a date you have with yourself. Face the mirror, and make love to yourself. Use dim lights to create a better effect.

Seducing the… sofa?
Use the armrest of your couch to stimulate your clit. Humping or saddling is an interesting position to masturbate. If you have a softer armrest, you are good to go as is. However, if the armrest is hard, we suggest you put a towel or soft cloth to cover it before you begin your session.

You’re welcome, already. Or should we say, well-cummed?


By Bhakti Paun Sharma

The English have landed

This phrase caught quite some momentum in the 18th-century France, when the British army was waging a war on them. It was a funny and dark take on the colour of the English uniform, which was red, and later went on to become a phrase for menstruating women. Well, why not? After all, there is literally a war going on inside us during that time of the month; physically and emotionally, as every position becomes a struggle and not even the charms of hunky Bollywood dudes such as Vicky Kaushal and Siddharth Chaturvedi aka MC Sher can’t subside the discomfort. However, what if we tell you that there was one solution to overcome it all, and that lay in busting an age-old myth?



We are talking about orgasm, a simple and pleasurable way to get rid of that menstruation pain, and do that by shunning the shame and stigma that has been built around masturbation during menstruation. No need to fidget. Sit back, relax as our expert is going drop some juicy bombs for you.

The best way to go on about your body is to befriend it and learn to live with it in a loving manner. Acquaint yourself with your hormones which cause your periods and even lead to a sharp rise in sexual appetite! Masturbation during menstruation can not only sate that sexual urge but also help calm down those terrible cramps. To validate that, we’ve got you special inputs from our expert gynecologist Sulbha Arora Bijur.


Masturbation during periods is nothing to be ashamed of. Thus, there is no need for you to suppress those urges if you feel like as it has no adverse effects. On the other hand, it relaxes your body during its most tumultuous period (pun intended). In fact, did you know there is a link between masturbation and period cramps? Endorphins released during an orgasm accentuate the pleasure felt by the body. It thus works as a distraction and is more like a green signal on red alert days.


Fingering and using a sex toy are the techniques that are absolutely fine as long as you are enjoying it. If insertion causes discomfort, do away with it and try clitoral stimulation. Or even simpler – humping.

Humping is one of the best techniques to masturbate during periods. No mess, no extra washing and cleaning and no pre-prep required. Just get your favourite pillow or towel out and rub it off. A word of caution for those using menstrual cups – you might want to check and adjust the position of your cups after the act.


However, there are a few things that you should keep in mind while pleasuring yourself during the periods. Although there are low to nil chances of infection, still, make sure that your hands and even your sex toys are thoroughly washed and cleaned before and after the act, if you try insertion techniques. Also, even though a lubricant may not be needed, still, if you feel the need for some extra friction, use water-based lubricants.


So the next time you find someone frowning at the idea of a pleasure-full and pain-free period, tell them that it’s backed by experts.

This Maysturbation month, take a vow to befriend your hormones and break the rules. Remember:

When life gives you a menstruation, amp it up with masturbation.

Masturbate to Sate the Mental State! Here’s why self-love is good for your mental health

By Bhakti Paun Sharma


Masturbation; while the word evokes streams of pleasure behind the doors, outside, a mere whisper of it in the conservative society leads to a mayhem. More so, when the sayer is a female. While the idea of men who masturbate is more socially accepted, the same is not the case with women. We cannot stress enough on how female masturbation remains a taboo and carries a social stigma to date, majorly because  However, slowly and steadily, women are breaking the boundaries and accepting their bodies, replete with all the pleasures. As they do so, why not explore it in a new light?

For instance, did you know that masturbation can help improve your mental health and keep it in a sated state? Yes, that’s true.

Wondering how? Zoom on the hidden virtues of this ‘forbidden’ but tempting practice, which will be a boon for your mind.

Nothing better to relax!


A stressful day, worries and shambles? How about allowing yourself a little pleasure to forget all that?

Masturbation helps to relax. In short, it replaces a cigarette or a nap! Caressing and cuddling relax both mind and body. A slow session of self-love can do the trick. When we masturbate, our brain releases endorphin, a hormone that brings a feeling of well-being. And if you reach an orgasm, the endorphin discharge is such that you will instantly feel good.

Farewell to stress


Masturbation also helps to de-stress. During your solo sessions, your brain secretes endorphins, dopamine, and oxytocin that reduce nervousness. So, during exams or when you have too much to do at work, do not hesitate, masturbate. These hormones have an anti-stress effect and post-orgasm relaxation can help to relax or sleep.

Stress has many problems attached to it, including depression, anxiety, cancer, or heart attacks. Therefore, if pleasing yourself can help reduce it, go for it.

It helps to sleep


Thank who? Thank you endorphins again. If you have trouble falling asleep, it can lead you on the right path while having fun. Just like a steamy session of sex with your partner can slide you into a deep slumber, masturbating can help you enjoy a sound sleep too.

The quickest way to be happy high


Research suggests that it takes women four minutes to reach seventh heaven by masturbating. So, we do not see any reason to deprive ourselves of this wonderful activity.

Feeling of well-being

masturbation happiness

Dopamine released during sex or masturbation is responsible for all the pleasure we feel. It has a powerful effect on your mind. It boosts self-confidence and promotes both physical and mental well-being.  

Finally, masturbating is not that complicated


If you still need reasons, here are some more facts you must know about masturbation:

  • The pleasure it provides releases endorphin, an anti-stress hormone, something that’s the best after an exhausting day.
  • In 4 minutes of masturbation, 95% of women achieve an orgasm! Sometimes more effective than sex with a partner.
  • It is an excellent painkiller. Endorphins act as an analgesic and help relieve headaches too.
Do I need to say anything more?


That’s all for now. I hope you liked the story. 

For more queries and suggestions, please write to me at

Masturbation and Music: An M&M more sweet and sensory than the original

By Bhakti Paun Sharma

Isn’t it surreal how music accompanies us in every moment of our life? It rhythms our frolics from the most tender to the most passionate and is an invisible shoulder when we are lonely and mellow. However, what if we tell you that there are songs and symphonies that can get you hot and high, turning your faucets just the right way? These are the songs that can amplify your emotions and create an undying memory of your clinching sessions.

Music conveys sensations and thus accelerates sexual pleasure. This effect is related to the secretion of dopamine by the brain. For those unaware, dopamine is the neurotransmitter that is responsible for the chills that you experience while listening to a song.

While porn with its mystical moans, or even erotic literature is your pick. However, we strongly advise you to try to use music as a backdrop for you to build exciting fantasies. Get transported into the world of your imagination and let nothing bar your creativity here.

And that’s why, we have prepared a playlist for you to indulge into the novelle way of indulging into some delicious activities for self pleasure. From classics to pop to film music, we present you our Top 15 most sensual songs. Up your masturbation game this may as the month of #Maysturbation takes over.

Sexxx Dreams – Lady Gaga

Love Me Like You Do – Ellie Goulding

Sex With Me – Rihanna

Love Me Harder – Ariana Grande and The Weeknd

Let Me Love You – Ariana Grande and Lil Wayne

Rocket – Beyoncé

Touch My Body – Mariah Carey

Hands to Myself – Selena Gomez

Burning Desire – Lana Del Rey

Meet Me in the Middle – Jessie Ware

Make You Feel – Alina Baraz

Lovage – Sex (I’m A)

Teardrop – Massive Attack

Glory Box – Portishead

Gimme Your Love – Morcheeba

Initiate your journey to ecstasy. Get, set, and go with one hand on the play button and the other on your honeypot, and immerse in the sea of pleasure.

Which ones are your favourites? Do you have more to suggest? Pipe up in the comments to let us know.

Expert Speaks: Does masturbation affect a person’s virginity?

By Bhakti Paun Sharma

Masturbation, specifically female masturbation, is a territory less explored and mostly forbidden. As a result, there are many myths that cloud over the clear picture. One of the most common one, for instance, is whether one remains a virgin after masturbating. The question is really not surprising given the honour that is placed on a girl’s virginity in the Indian sub-continent. As the month of Maysturbation kicks off, we at She & You have decided to carry the baton of clearing the mist around the mast of pleasure; all with the help of experts.

So coming back to the topic. Let’s re-frame the question Will the hymen remain intact after masturbation? We consulted Sexologist and founder of Infinity Clinic, Delhi, Dr. Anuneet Sabharwal, MD Psychiatry and he had some interesting this to share with us on the matter.

Rest easy, women, for masturbation does not affect your hymen in anyway, if at all that matters much to you. Female masturbation, in most cases, targets the clitoris and not the vagina. Also, contrary to the popular opinion, the hymen doesn’t determine whether or not you are a virgin. You can have an intact hymen but not be a virgin. You can also be a virgin and yet have a torn hymen (by the introduction of a tampon, a finger, vigorous exercise, or an accident). So, if you need to know if your hymen is intact, get it examined.

Culturally, we have often attributed a symbolic value to virginity; and usually, it is the first sexual relationship that determines the end of it. Masturbation, therefore, has nothing to do with it. The hymen, a thin membrane attached to the walls of the vagina immediately behind the vaginal opening, is very different in shape, elasticity, and thickness, and also differs from one woman to another. Also, did you know that some girls are born without hymen?

There are numerous circumstances that may lead to the tearing of hymen and subsequent loss of virginity. In some women, it perforates more easily than others, according to the characteristics of their hymen (types of perforation, flexibility or rigidity, thickness). Regarding the insertion of a finger into the vagina (by a partner or by the woman herself), different scenarios are possible. The hymen can remain intact, be partially perforated, or more rarely, be torn. It can be accidentally torn during a fall or through vigorous exercise too. Sometimes the hymen is so elastic that it does not break even after several such episodes.

On the contrary, it can happen that certain sports activities, such as cycling or horseback riding, can lead to tearing of this membrane. Of course, the use of a tampon or masturbation can also cause it to break but are not the sole reasons. Hence, the rupture of hymen is merely a symbolic and cultural reference to virginity.

All being said and done, masturbation really has less to no connect with the loss of hymen and virginity. However, we are in the 21st century. It is high time we got off the horse of purity and virginity, and stopped considering sex a taboo or even a benchmark of a woman’s character. Women are much more than a mere stain on the bed sheet, post the wedding night.

Fingering out the benefits of female masturbation

By Bhakti Paun Sharma

Women and masturbation; there was a time when all hell would have broken loose had these two words been used in the same breath. Unlike males, females have forever been asked to suppress their desires in the name of culture. As a result, even masturbation was an unknown territory for the longest time, and a forbidden one even after. Even though we are in the 21st century, and times are slowly changing with the acceptance of liberal views, female sexuality is still much of a taboo in a country like ours which runs on familial values and concepts and considers sex and desires as sins. Various scary superstitions were also promoted to keep women away from pleasuring themselves. For example, they were told that masturbation is an evil practice that would lead to blindness, impotency, acne, and more. The number of women who masturbate is less than half of the men; and these figures comprise only the reported ones which come majorly from urban and woke people. Remote areas cannot even fathom the fact that women have desires.

However, all of it is a myth. Masturbation is actually healthy for you and studies and research have proved the same. Sexologist and founder of Infinity Clinic, Delhi, Dr. Anuneet Sabharwal, MD Psychiatry shares with us some of these pros of masturbation.

Encourages exploration of self


Many women are unaware of their own anatomy and how they can pleasure themselves. Masturbation encourages them to explore and understand their own bodies and fall in love with it. After all, you’ll only discover what stimulates you sexually when you caress yourself; and it is only then you can boldly tell your partner the same too.

Helps you sleep better


Orgasms lead to a massive release of endorphins, which promote a deep sleep and produce an intense sensation of all being well. Masturbation before bedtime will give you a good night’s sleep.

Breaks the dry spell


Casual sex is not everyone’s cup of tea and there are times when you may not be ready to be in a relationship, emotionally or physically. For those times, masturbation is the best way to release the sexual tension and satiate your libido.

Busts that pain


Endorphins, which are released in massive numbers as you orgasm, act as natural painkillers. These help not only with migraine pains, but also the cramps related to menstruation. While sex toys and fingers may not be your choice at that point of time, you can try different positions of rubbing and throbbing to reach your ultimate goal.

Eases that stress


As per a study, it takes a woman to reach orgasm in about four minutes, when she masturbates; which is a good way of getting rid of all the worries and indulging in a few stolen moments of satisfaction and happiness.

Promotes and promises better sex


It is a false belief that masturbation leads to a damp sex life for it raises the bar too high. Yeah, apparently women reaching a climax during sex is a high bar. Nevertheless, masturbation is one of the best ways to improve your sex life for you can educate your partner and guide him or her towards your sexual points in a better way.

A finger a day, truly keeps dissatisfaction and sadness away. So, flick your pot honey, because masturbation is here to stay. 

We’ll take your leave with this glorious parting message.


Feature image credit: Christopher Campbell/Unsplash

#BreaktheHate! Just Masturbate

By Kadambari Srivastava

When ‘Veere Di Wedding’ hit the screen, it seemed like a harmless flick on friendship. But it got audiences screaming virtually all over at Swara Bhasker’s masturbation scene, which eventually reached orgasm on social media. It stirred controversies and got people sending her hate.

That saga did not end here. Recently, during the election fever, she was trolled by misogynistic morons with demeaning hashtags like #useyourfinerwisely and not like Swara Bhasker.

If a celebrity is subject to so much hatred for merely enacting masturbation (which by the way, is very healthy for women), what would happen if we simply speak about it in real life? Is it so wrong to pleasure oneself, especially when women are already deprived of orgasms when it comes to penetrative sex?

So we decided to give a finger – no, two fingers, to this unnecessary patriarchal atttiude. We are going to not just write this one piece on masturbation, but celebrate it!


In case you did not know, May is the International Masturbation Month, and we at She & You are ready to burst some balls, along with you. Educate, empower, and emerge, sans any shame, because your sexual desires and satisfaction are as important as a man’s, and you need not be ashamed of it. So we are here with the month of Maysturbation, and a lot of hot stories, just for you; ranging from educative to entertaining, we promise we will keep your fingers busy ;). Take notes, women, for loving yourself and worshipping your body is not against any culture; it has been made so because it hurts the minuscule egos of some.

Stats speak that nearly 7.9 per cent of women aged between 25 and 29 masturbate two to three times a week. As per yet another survey, 92 per cent of men and 62 per cent of women masturbate in their entire life. One of the major reasons for a lower reported rate for women is their reluctance to indulge in this topic, and also the ignorance around the same, given the huge taboo that women sexuality is. You’d be surprised to know that there are innumerable women who are unaware of the wonders their bodies behold. Sure enough, their fantasies take flight, whether in the heart of a city or in the remote rural corner. However, most of them include being moony-eyed around husbands who care less about their sexual desires, and turn around to snore after ‘planting the seed’ and satiating their own cores.


Let’s ask, why is society averse to masturbation, especially of women. The answer lies in the patriarchal culture which is steeped in the very roots of orthodox cultures. As a result, if women express a mere whiff of desire or demands pleasure during sex, she is frowned upon. She is supposed to be coy, for one moan or dirty mnemonics of pleasure, and she is labelled a prostitute (a highly sexist abuse in itself).

No more!

Let your hair loose and beat around the bush, for we are taking a leaf out of Swara’s book and leaving the stigma behind. Raise that finger and love yourself, because whether you believe it or not, you are worth it. Let’s bust all the myths around women masturbation and break the taboos around it. Let’s unlearn the shame and embrace the pleasure knots that unravel our senses. It’s the month of Maysturbation, and let’s play that #Masturstroke, bold and nice. Break the hate, just masturbate.